Getting tough with the outside world is one thing, getting tough with my own child is also not something I had signed up for. From the age of 6 months old, when the suspicion of cerebral palsy was confirmed, physio commenced and stiff hamstrings discovered I have been doing daily hamstring stretches. Making your child cry on a daily basis by hurting him is Not A Fun Thing To Do. Having your son use his limited language skills to plead with you not to do the stretches just sucks, there is no other word for it. The orthopeadic consultant saying Nathan's hammies are looser than his own mollifies a bit, but doesn't make it easier. All you can do is pin him down, persist, keep explaining that it is to make sure he can crawl, hop around, pull to stand, walk and ride his trike. Which he may understand but certainly does not appreciate in the moment. It's a surprise he doesn't hate me frankly, although the carefully built in ritual of hugs and cuddles after may have helped with that. 

Perhaps unsurprisingly it leaves you a bit puzzled when a mate tells you that she cannot get antibiotics into her two year old because said child doesn't like it and wriggles too much! 

Less dramatically it's sometimes necessary to be tough to help Nathan practice his skills. 'Want on sofa', ok then honey make a start, use your arms and legs, pull to stand then I will help with the last bit. No? Ok then stay on the floor. Strop. Ignore. Strop. Ignore. Pulls to stand, I help, I win, skills practiced. When he had just learned to sit himself up he would often find a suddenly very necessary toy just out of reach and would grunt at me to get it. And I would say 'You will still be disabled when you are 18, get on with it yourself'. Helping doesn't always help. 

Although that time in the supermarket car park when I told him to 'Help me to get you out of the trolley, you are not THAT disabled' I did see a few shocked faces! But you have no choice. Your aim is to help your child to become as independent as possible with a view to the future, and if that child has significant challenges you cannot leave it to happen all by itself!